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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24177448">Shine, Like Diamond In The Dirt, Hard To Tell What It's Worth</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/TinySpiney/pseuds/TinySpiney'>TinySpiney</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>I See You [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Human, Coming Out, Gen, Human Connor (Detroit: Become Human), Human CyberLife Tower Connor | RK800-60 (Detroit: Become Human), Human Upgraded Connor | RK900, Mentioned Chris Miller (Detroit: Become Human), Mentioned Gavin Reed, Upgraded Connor | RK900 Has ADHD</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 22:55:28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,345</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24177448</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/TinySpiney/pseuds/TinySpiney</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
      <p>Title is from I Am Here (I Am Alive) by Bonny Doon</p>
    </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Connor &amp; CyberLife Tower Connor | RK800-60, Connor &amp; CyberLife Tower Connor | RK800-60 &amp; Upgraded Connor | RK900, Connor &amp; Upgraded Connor | RK900, CyberLife Tower Connor | RK800-60 &amp; Upgraded Connor | RK900</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>I See You [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1730275</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>39</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Shine, Like Diamond In The Dirt, Hard To Tell What It's Worth</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Title is from I Am Here (I Am Alive) by Bonny Doon</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em> August 15th 2028 5:13 PM </em>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>Realistically speaking, Niles wasn’t expecting to see the twins. They were probably still at work or something. So there he was, sitting on his bedroom floor with three different textbooks open on three different tablets. So what if he wasn’t going to be deciding on a college just yet? It wouldn’t hurt to get acquainted with the material a little bit first. Actually, it would probably help a whole hell of a lot. He absentmindedly chewed on the edge of the tablet pen, a bad habit he’d had since he was a kid. Not exactly with tablet pens. But basically anything he could get away with sticking in his mouth. Damn his oral fixation, he ruined so many good pens that way. Though it was better than wearing a hole in his sweater, this one was his favourite. It was big and bulky and warm. Niles paused in his thoughts, thinking back to the stim toys he wanted online. There was a cute jellyfish one he liked, plus since it was slightly textured it would be harder to see if there were teeth marks in it. Sea creatures were really cool anyway. Plus, Connor liked them a lot, he’d probably think the necklace was neat. Connor was pretty neat himself, even if he could be annoying as hell. It was his and Calebs’ birthday today. Niles wondered if the twins were going to be coming home to celebrate their birthday. Probably not, they’d be busy. But he wanted them to come home. </p><p>A soft knock on his door brought him out of his thoughts. Though the end of the pen he had between his teeth was still there. Niles quickly removed it and grinned, bolting up from the floor to hug his older brothers. Connor, ever the shit that he was, made the Roblox death noise. Caleb settled for hugging him back. Of course they’d be back home, it was their birthday! It was exciting to have them back, Niles missed them. Plus he had saved up some money to buy them trinkets from the store he worked at. But they’d get their presents later. Right now it was time for a family hug. It was gonna be a while until their mother got home. It was late these days. But their father was in the kitchen getting their birthday dinner ready-- <em> Oh of course they were coming home, he was cooking. </em></p><p>Connor was quick to ask about the textbook files open on the tablets. Caleb squatted down on the floor to take a look at them. He was impressed with Niles, they were medical textbooks. Though the twins knew there was no way he got the files legally. That didn’t matter. Not really. Hopefully. Though Caleb didn’t say anything about it when he stood back up, and neither did Connor. Mission successful, then. Connor went to go sit down on the edge of Niles’ bed, it was all made up nice and neat the way he liked it. Sheets and comforter tucked in at the footboard, his two pillows side by side and slightly under the covers. An old plush Golden Retriever sitting on the pillow next to the wall. Connor picked her up and bumped his nose against hers. An age old thing that the brothers had done since Niles was very little. To be honest, he had to hide the little snort that came from him. He still thought it was kind of funny. Especially now that the twins were adults working with the DPD, and he was almost going to be the age for college soon. It was weird seeing two identical men, dressed in identical uniforms, standing in their little brother’s room and booping a plush dog’s nose with their own. Well, Caleb was still standing in the doorway. Connor was sitting on the bed. Niles decided to join him, his bones were going to hurt from sitting on the floor hunched over for what was probably three plus hours. Hyperfixations were both a blessing and a curse. </p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>“Hey Nines, I was wondering if I could talk to you for a minute about something.” Caleb closed the door and leaned on it with his arms crossed. Niles stiffened. What happened? Was everything okay? “It’s nothin’ bad, I promise. I just wanted to ask if you’d be okay with it. It’s something very...personal.”</p><p> </p><p>“Uh, yeah. Yeah, who am I to say no? You guys are nineteen now.”</p><p> </p><p>“If it gets to be too much information, tell us, okay?” Connor brushed back his curls with one hand. Ever the big brother. He looked up at Caleb from the bed and smiled. “Caleb?”</p><p> </p><p>“Right, okay. So, Nines, you know how everybody’s different? Like some people like, uhh, people? I, uhh, well-- Oh for fuck’s sake, you’re not twelve anymore.” Caleb shook his head, his hands balled into fists under his arms. But he said it wasn’t something bad. Why was he reacting like it was? “Niles, I’m gay. Like, actually certifiably, gay. Okay, maybe not certifiably. But you get it.”</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>Huh. That would explain some stuff. Caleb was always just a little different from the other kids. Well, he was a little different from the boys. The girls though, he got along with the girls more. He had a ton of girl friends growing up. They were constantly at the house hanging out. Some of them tried flirting with Connor, who wasn’t having it at any age, but most of them adored Niles. He didn’t know why. He was just idly existing in the house doing whatever. Maybe it was the curls. Their dad said he unintentionally won over quite a few ladies when he was in school because of his curls. Maybe that was why those girls liked Caleb so much. He had nice hair. The boys in his and Connor’s classes never understood why they didn’t use product in it. Well for one; it would clog their pores if it wasn’t washed out correctly. And two; Caleb wasn’t trying to impress the girls. He just wanted his hair how he wanted it. </p><p>Caleb also never really liked the girls the way the boys did. The way the boys would look at them wistfully. Caleb looked at the boys like that. Growing up, Niles had watched Connor and Caleb. Connor seemed uncomfortable whenever someone tried to flirt with him. He’d politely decline and move about his day. Caleb however, would stammer and scrunch up his nose when a boy flirted with him. But if a girl did, he’d say yes to a date immediately. The societal expectations of compulsory heteronormativity. At least that’s what Niles thought it was now. He felt like he had to fit in, so he made himself fit in. But never once did he date a girl. He let them drag him on a date, and then decline any further advancements. Niles wasn’t sure whether to congratulate him on dealing with it for so long, or to feel like Caleb was being kind of mean for leading those girls on. Probably both. </p><p>His brother was gay. So what? Actually, Caleb looked ready to pass out, he was so nervous. So Niles wouldn’t make a big deal out of it. He’d accept it and move on. It wasn’t that big a deal anyway, it was still Caleb. Caleb who loved to tease Connor at every waking moment. Caleb who used to let Niles sneak into his bed when he had nightmares as a kid. Caleb, who was probably going to be seen in a different light by their parents. Niles hadn’t thought about that. Their mom wasn’t exactly...supportive of that...<em> lifestyle, </em> as she called it. Their father on the other hand. He’d probably be supportive. Kind of. He didn’t exactly understand that sort of thing, but he didn’t actively discriminate against it like their mother seemed to. So Niles was going to be supportive of him like Connor so obviously was. Niles wasn’t going to make a big deal out of it. He’d say that it was okay and then move on. </p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>“Oh, okay.” He stuck the pen back in his mouth and moved to the floor again. The carpet felt nice under his fingers anyway. Caleb gawked at him. “What? That’s great, Caleb, I’m proud of you. But you know that doesn’t matter to me, right? You’re still the older brother who got peanut butter in my hair and laughed when I cried about it as a kid.”</p><p> </p><p>“Niles, take that out of your mouth, please.” Connor handed him a small chewy toy he had hidden in one of his night table drawers. Their mother didn’t like it when he had it in his mouth. “This’ll be easier on your mouth.”</p><p> </p><p>“Dude, he chews on that, don’t touch it.” Caleb scrunched his nose up in disgust before turning to Niles. “At least rinse it off, please. He touched stuff at a crime scene earlier.”</p><p> </p><p>“Gross.”</p><p> </p><p>“Absolutely.”</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>The three burst into laughter. Yeah, that was disgusting. Connor had a habit of foregoing gloves. That was something Niles knew all too well. The man almost stuck his hands directly in the oven to take out some cookies once. It was both horrifying and intriguing to think about how his thought process worked in that moment. But for now he’d let his older brothers scold him for sitting on the floor like that for so long. He’d let them gently jostle him around. Niles did get up to quickly rinse off the chewy toy, hiding it up his sleeve just in case. Not that their mother would be home any time soon. But he was still a little embarrassed about it. Not that their father minded it at all, he encouraged it actually. The thought made Niles smile. He said he used to do something similar when he was a kid, so that was comforting. </p><p>He stuck it in his mouth when he got back in the room. Caleb and Connor were hunched over one of the tablets. The one with information on ADHD. Niles wanted to scramble over and take it out of their hands, but Caleb just nodded and gave him a knowing smile. That was...nice. So he sat with them and let them scroll through the mess of textbook jumble that they could make out. Though Niles did eventually take the tablet and pull up some other resources he’d found earlier that afternoon. That had been his big thing lately, looking up as much as he could about ADHD. It fit him pretty well, he’d say. From the stimming, to the attention, the fidgeting, the auditory stimulation sensitivity. That one was a big one. If there were too many different sounds, they started to clash together and give him a headache. Not only that but they felt like they filled his head, they only seemed to get louder and louder. It hurt. It was too much information. </p><p>But just thinking about it too much would get him riled up. Today was his brothers’ birthday and he was determined to be in a good place when he gave them their presents. <em> Which were still in the bag he bought them in under his bed. </em> Shit, shit, shit. Okay, he could work with that. Niles got up off the bed, and told them they should go say hello to their dad if they didn't already. Chances were, Caleb was so worked up over telling Niles that he forgot to. Chances were, he was right. Caleb stood from the bed and made a mad dash out the doorway, once he opened it at least, and Connor followed. With a sigh, Niles got down on the floor to drag the bag out. They wouldn’t care if they weren’t wrapped. But <em> he’d </em> care if the price tags were still on them. It wasn’t much, really. Just an extremely potent smelling candle for Connor, and a packet of googly eyes for Caleb. Caleb <em> really </em> liked pissing people off with sticking them to everything. Connor liked strong candles because apparently he was awful. Niles took the price tags off of them, fiddling with the chewy in his mouth as he did so. Above average midterm score present from Connor. </p><p>He must have spaced out for a while. There were voices in another part of the house, but it didn’t bother Niles any. It wasn’t what he needed to focus on at the moment. There was a loud noise somewhere in the house. Probably Caleb being dramatic and doing <em> something. </em> Soon enough, the twins came back to his room. After he tucked the bag under his bed again of course. Niles sat on the floor leaning against the side of his bed, tablet in hand and reading through more of the textbook. Caleb crouched in front of him, poking at his knees until Connor sighed and sat down next to Niles. Something was wrong, his body language was off. He put the tablet down in front of himself and let Connor pull him against his side. Something was wrong. His breathing was different. Niles quickly looked at Caleb, his breathing was too. Shoulders drawn up close, one hand grabbing a handful of his uniform shirt. He didn’t meet Niles’ eyes. But the slight shake in his hand was very telling. The noise he heard after the voices. Something happened. </p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>“Mom’s, uhh, probably not coming to dinner tonight.”</p><p> </p><p>“You told her.” Niles reached out for Caleb, putting his hand where his brother could see it and facing his palm up. An invitation, he didn’t have to take it if he didn’t want to. “I would have liked it if you told me. I would have helped soften the blow, you know that.”</p><p> </p><p>“You know we couldn’t do that.” Connor rubbed his arm and rested his cheek against his head. “You don’t have to do that.”</p><p> </p><p>“I would have <em> wanted </em> to.” Niles gently elbowed Connor before moving on to look at Caleb. “How did Dad take it?”</p><p> </p><p>“He didn’t say I was a ‘fucking disappointment’ out loud at least.” </p><p> </p><p>“Caleb--”</p><p> </p><p>“I’m fine.” He stood up, sniffing and scrubbing his tears away. He never did like to let anyone see him cry. Even when they were kids. “I just wanna eat and then go to bed.”</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>It <em> was </em> just about six, dinner was probably almost ready. It was going to be tense and rigid. But it would still be a birthday dinner for his older brothers. So the three of them went down to the kitchen to help their dad set up for dinner. It was quiet, only the clinking of dishes and silverware being set down on the table and footsteps were heard. Also the occasional muttered swear from Caleb. More silence as they sat down and got ready to eat. Connor must not have been able to handle the silence, and to be honest, Niles was starting to hate it too. Connor started talking about his day at the DPD. How apparently the patrols were going well until some random guy tried to rob a store. While he and Gavin were in it. Which ended with a swift arrest and a grateful shopkeeper. </p><p>Caleb smiled a little bit and said some Red Ice dealer tried to fight Chris Miller. He apparently also resisted arrest and tried to bite Caleb’s hand when he went to shove his head down. Resulting in Chris cuffing the guy while Caleb brought him to the back of the cruiser. Niles had only met Chris a few times, but knew he was tall and looked like he worked out. Which he probably had to considering he was a part of the DPD and had to pass the physical endurance tests. The stories about their days got Niles talking about his. School was boring as per usual, he got most of his work done in class. He had fun in his music and English classes. But mostly tried to get away with reading in between assignments and lessons. </p><p>Their dad didn’t say much about his day. Just that it was long and he was pretty sure he was getting under people's skin. Which got a few smiles from around the table. He was a mortician, the one who got the body all nice and freshly dead looking for funerals. So of course he’d get under people’s skin. But apparently the joke was the most eventful part of his day. Aside from Caleb coming out and their mother leaving in a huff apparently, though no one mentioned that fact. Though it was obvious Caleb thought it. He started pushing his food around instead of eating it, not really looking up when Connor spoke to him. He was going to say he wasn’t really feeling well, then ask to be excused, and then go up to bed. That was what he always did to avoid tension at the dinner table. He had done it since they were kids. It was something that concerned Niles as he got older and heard more about mental illness and self-harm. It wasn’t surprising when Caleb said he didn’t feel well and was going to bed, but when Connor said he was going to go lay down as well it was. So much so that Niles took the brief pause of their father trying to say they could go ahead to bed and said he was going too. The three of them got up, and went to their rooms. </p><p>Niles grabbed the bag from under his bed and stood in Caleb’s doorway. Connor was trying to talk to him, trying to hug him, but Caleb just wasn’t having it. He shoved Connor away and said he didn’t want to talk to anyone. Niles figured he could set the pack of googly eyes on the floor outside his door then. But maybe the humour could help him right now, he supposed he’d just have to take a calculated risk. </p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>“Caleb? I’ve got something for you.”</p><p> </p><p>“God, fuck-- Niles.” Caleb turned away from the door and started to get undressed. Tough shit, they grew up together. Getting into pajamas was a normal thing around each other. “Can you just-- Please go.”</p><p> </p><p>“I’m just gonna set it down at the foot of the bed, then.” Niles took out the pack of googly eyes without looking at Connor. He smiled to himself before turning away to leave the room. “Happy birthday, Caleb.”</p><p> </p><p>“Fuck, Niles, wait.” Niles turned back around to see Caleb with a smile and coming at him for a hug. Niles sighed gently and hugged his brother back. “Thank you. You know I love you, don’t you?”</p><p> </p><p>“I know you do. I love you too.” Niles handed the bag to Connor as best he could. “And Connor too, I don’t discriminate between you guys. Even if one of you stuck peanut butter in my hair and laughed about it while I cried.”</p><p> </p><p>“That was once!”</p><p> </p><p>“It still sucked for him, Caleb.” Connor joined the hug after smelling the candle. “Thank you, Niles. I think you just made our birthday pretty great. We love you.”</p><p> </p><p>“I love you guys, too.”</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>Okay sure, their birthday probably should have gone much better. But Caleb practically vibrating as he said he was sticking googly eyes to everything Gavin held dear was still good. The way Connor sat there smelling his candle for a little while was still good. The way they snuck down to the den to put on old Disney movies was still good. Even if some of them were kind of outdated, and Connor wanted to watch every <em> Little Mermaid </em> movie. Caleb wanted to watch Marvel movies since they <em> were </em> owned by Disney. Much to his dismay, he actually hated the company quite a bit. But Niles was having fun. He almost forgot he had his chewy toy hidden in his sleeve, thank fuck for bulky sweaters. He took it out, wiping it off on his jeans, and gently bit it. </p><p> </p><p>Yeah. </p><p> </p><p>Tonight was still good. </p><p><br/>
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  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Sorry if this feels a little jumbled and kinda choppy with the topics at hand!!! But, uhh, I let my sleepy ADHD riddled brain just go right the fuck off with what it wanted. So hey, look at that it's more organic I guess</p></blockquote></div></div>
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